Why Do We Settle?

There are so many mediocre things in life and love isn’t one of them”

I think we all fall victim to settling in one or more aspects of our lives. We convince ourselves that “okay” is good enough. Whether it’s a job that you don’t particularly love, or a way of life you’re not quite enjoying , we seem to compromise for things that make us less happy than we could be.

We tend to sell ourselves short. We persuade ourselves into thinking that either we’re not deserving of that happiness or that it isn’t realistically attainable in the first place. 

It’s understandable when you think of it. Saying you want to strive for the best in every aspect of your life definitely sounds way easier said than done. Sometimes, we are put into positions where we have to settle and make sacrifices for those we love, or put the needs of others before our own. But does that mean we simply should give up on ever trying to work our way from a life that is mediocre to one that can be so much more in the future? 

Time is always regarded as our enemy. We’re scared for our futures mostly because we don’t know if such a thing will exist. So , we rush into things. In our fast paced society , the pressure to hurry up and get your life together is daunting. It seems like we’re in such a rush to grow up. I remember when I was younger , I couldn’t wait to be an “adult” that had their shit together. I thought being in your 20’s was the coolest thing ever-how fucking naive of me. I mean , sure , maybe being in your 20’s is cool , if you’re a masochist that loves having mental breakdowns every other day , being stressed out on all days ending in “y” and being so poor that you have to decide whether it is financially wise of you to spend that $2 on coffee.

In this attempt to get our shit together as fast as possible, we make decisions that cause us to settle for a life we didn’t really want in the first place. We end up in the wrong career paths. We end up in the wrong houses. And sadly, we often end up with the wrong person.

We fear the future so much that we take what we can get right away. If we’re in a relationship that we’re okay with,  but not nearly in love with, we tend to convince ourselves to stay in it. Why ? For fear of breaking out of what has become comfortable and familiar? For fear of never finding anyone better ? For fear of ending up alone? 

As much as we may be in a race against time, I live by the mantra that it is never too late. Sure , our futures may not be set in stone- hell, we can go at any minute. But , would you rather waste whatever time you have settling for a love that merely makes you content or would you rather spend it pursuing one that makes you feel more alive than ever? 

Give yourself a chance to find someone that knocks your socks off. To find a love full of passion. Don’t put up with bullshit just because you don’t think you are deserving of anything better. Don’t go into a relationship just for the sake of getting into one. Love isn’t something that you can rush and it definitely isn’t something you should compromise. 

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12 thoughts on “Why Do We Settle?

  1. So true. That is why I think it is really important that we learn to love ourselves, before finding someone to love us. There are so many people that are in this boat because they can’t stand being alone. I say, find your happiness while you’re alone. Once you’re happy with yourself, you’ll be much pickier when deciding on who will disrupt what you already have.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. “Only fools rush in” a song once said. Go find that someone who can “knock your socks off”! Or that someone who can take your sanity away and can make you do insanely crazy and death defying things! In love and in life, that’s how it should be. Don’t settle for mediocrity. We all deserve the best, at least according to our respective definitions of the word “best”.
    I had fun reading this! Insightful and fun 😃

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Such a nice article, whatever you’ve so awesomely written there with some hilarious description of life in 20s (exactly what I’m facing! I was such a happy child in my teens and I’m a mess these days!) They’re all true.
    But the silver lining of never giving up and keeping your efforts on was the best part❤😄

    Liked by 1 person

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