So the title of this post might have you a bit confused. I’m sure we all know the saying , ” don’t judge a book by its cover”, and that is 100% true. This year I’ve met people who have proven my prior judgements about them completely wrong. Although it’s hard, I know trying to act like you know someone’s “type” right off the bat is the wrong thing to do.
Being a psychology student , a lot of people think I have some special ability to read people. And as much as I wish that were true, it isn’t. We can pretend we can see right through people all we want , but at the end of the day everyone has a backstory that we know nothing about. Trying to act like we know a person without being empathetic towards their past struggles or life experiences is simply ignorant.
To take this one step farther, 2016 taught me that as much as you think you may know all of the “contents” of a person, odds are you still won’t understand them 100%. Much like a book, the person standing before you exists in a specific time at a specific place. As much as we may hate to admit it, we are moulded by our pasts. But , don’t get me wrong, we are not defined by them.
And that’s exactly what 2016 has taught me :
LESSON #13: JUDGING A PERSON BASED OFF OF WHO THEY WERE IN THE PAST IS UNFAIR. YOU WILL NEVER TRULY GET TO KNOW SOMEONE UNLESS YOU ALLOW YOURSELF TO GROW ALONGSIDE THEM, SHIFTING YOUR PERCEPTIONS OF WHO THEY ARE FROM THE PAST AND EVEN THE PRESENT, TO THE FUTURE AND THE POTENTIAL THEY CARRY INSIDE OF THEM.
Time changes people. Life changes people. People change pepole. I never believed this to be true, but this year has proven me wrong.
Five years from now, I don’t expect to be the same person I am today , so why should I judge someone based off of who they were five years from today , or even who they are right now ? We are not static beings. We are meant to learn , grow and evolve.
So , next time you meet someone who has had a somewhat shady past, don’t completely write them off. Take the time to truly understand a person , what they have been through and try to see the potential that lies within in them. Give people a chance.